as many people are
around the world…
today I am remembering
9-11
I have a different take
on 9-11 than most
because
even though
I spent that day
tied to my chair
in my living room
not even able
to get up
to get dressed
although I spent the day
shocked and weeping…
although I was horrified
of the mass destruction,
the heinous loss of lives
and the ground swell of
sympathy/empathy
from around the world
9-11 for me
kick started
my lagging life
catapulted me into action
9-11 made me take a look
at the waiting game
I’d been playing
around my health
and life in general..
and make a commitment
to begin living again
I’ve told the story often enough
of my getting up
on the 12th of Sept that year
and dragging the VOD
off to the hairdressers
and shaving my head
for the first time
part of my commitment
to getting me back
from the hole
I’d been hiding in
…it was a way
to end the self conscious agony
I’d been living in
since my hair
had begun to fall out
and my medication
and then diet
had caused me to gain
almost 150 more lbs
it was the first step…
and it was prompted by
the very clear understanding
that we don’t get a 2nd chance
that we have no way
of knowing
when we’ll be chosen
to leave this web…
and it was brought about
by those planes
hitting the 2 towers in Manhattan
or the Pentagon
so here I am
10 years after
there have been
hard lessons learned
and lots of
trial and error
plenty more tears
tons of agony
and self flagellation
placing trust too easily
but I’m still
as committed to
experiencing each and every
day of my life
as I was
on the 12th of Sept
I’ve learned to lick
my wounds
and move on
and that
in some odd way
makes 9-11
my own personal blessing
for which
I’m grateful
