{"id":1798,"date":"2009-04-16T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2009-04-16T18:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/beltdrivebetty.com\/wyzwmnsworld\/?p=1798"},"modified":"2010-09-29T18:25:28","modified_gmt":"2010-09-30T01:25:28","slug":"rambling-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/?p=1798","title":{"rendered":"Rambling…."},"content":{"rendered":"

the nicest thing about
\n
beating yer head
\n
against a brick wall
\n
is that it feels so good
\n
when you quit<\/p>\n

(don’t read anything into that
\n
I ain’t quiting anything)<\/p>\n

today I got to spend some time
\n
sitting at my desk at work
\n
crying
\n
cos I got an email from “a friend”
\n
that was mean…
\n
really mean<\/p>\n

who it was
\n
is none of your business <\/span><\/strong>
\n

\n
suffice it to say
\n
it hurt
\n
because it was from someone
\n
who’s friendship I valued
\n
and who has apparently decided
\n
to no longer be my friend<\/p>\n

someone who in essence told me
\n
that as a result of his interpretation of my blog
\n
(not actually speaking to me…my blog no less)
\n
that I was no longer welcome<\/p>\n

the criterion behind my friendships
\n
are a personal understanding
\n
of ethics
\n
morals
\n
and fairness<\/p>\n

in my family
\n
it has always been a joke
\n
that I was wise
\n
from an early age
\n
but apparently not wise enough
\n
for my friends
\n
who like nothing more than to
\n
judge me
\n
for their perception of my words
\n
not my actions<\/p>\n

I have spent many years of my life
\n
fighting from virtually insurmountable odds
\n
(I don’t say this cos I think I’m the only one<\/span><\/strong>
\n
<\/span><\/strong>that has had a tough life…<\/span><\/strong>
\n
I say this because it’s true…<\/span><\/strong>
\n
some small part of which <\/span><\/strong>
\n
I’ve outlined here in a story)
\n
to stop being selfish
\n
and to do my best to be fair<\/p>\n

when I see someone
\n
doing something that I know
\n
is unfair
\n
I feel that it is an obligation
\n
to call them on it<\/p>\n

and when I’m wrong
\n
I say so<\/p>\n

sadly
\n
not everyone has that ability <\/span><\/strong>
\n
or apparently even <\/span><\/strong>
\n
wants to have it<\/p>\n

one of the things that I value <\/span><\/strong>
\n
about my friends dearly
\n
is the ability
\n
to disagree with them
\n
and to not have to end <\/span><\/strong>
\n
a friendship
\n
as a result<\/p>\n

and I make it a practice
\n
to never say anything behind some one’s back
\n
that I wouldn’t say to their face<\/p>\n

sometimes that doesn’t <\/span><\/strong>
\n
work out in my favor
\n
and I get my feelings hurt
\n
but in the end
\n
I will stand by what I believe to be right<\/p>\n

and truly
\n
if the act of being my friend
\n
is too tiring
\n
that’s not my problem
\n
it’s yours…. <\/span><\/strong>
\n

\n
it hurts
\n
but it’s not my problem<\/p>\n

I will do my best
\n
to hold accountable
\n
people who judge others unfairly
\n
myself included
\n
and call people on it
\n
when they do so<\/p>\n

when I do call them on it
\n
I often do so from a position of
\n
innuendo on this blog<\/p>\n

however…in an effort to speak my piece
\n
but not actually come out
\n
and name someone specifically
\n
because I’ve actually been threatened
\n
both physically and legally in the past
\n
long before I came to write on this blog
\n
people often take what I say
\n
as colored by their own narrow minds…<\/p>\n

sadly – this blog will likely be my undoing
\n
because people don’t read what I write
\n
as verbatim
\n
they read it from their own misguided
\n
perception (“so what I think I hear you saying…”)<\/p>\n

and instead of asking
\n
they freak….<\/p>\n

but still
\n
I will continue to strive daily
\n
to separate the actions
\n
from the person
\n
you know “love the sinner….hate the sin”?
\n
(thanks Eden)<\/p>\n

that’s why I don’t take the end of
\n
a friendship lightly
\n
the last time I was months
\n
agonizing over it
\n
and listening to other’s misguided
\n
direction
\n
as opposed to doing what was right
\n
in my heart
\n
from the get go…<\/p>\n

so
\n
I’m sorry that you seem to find it
\n
too much work
\n
you ain’t always been
\n
a walk in the freakin park
\n
yerself LoL<\/span><\/strong>
\n
<\/span><\/strong>
\n
oh and p.s<\/span><\/strong>
\n
to all the people<\/span><\/strong>
\n
who like to capture posts <\/span><\/strong>
\n
from my blog<\/span><\/strong>
\n
and email them hither and yon<\/span><\/strong>
\n
<\/span><\/strong>
\n
keep up the good work<\/span><\/strong>
\n
you’ll get your reward <\/span><\/strong>
\n
I’m sure!<\/span><\/strong>
\n
<\/span><\/strong>
\n
cos apparently ya’ll have forgotten<\/span><\/strong>
\n
that I’m human<\/span><\/strong>
\n
that I can be hurt <\/span><\/strong>
\n
and that apparently<\/span><\/strong>
\n
I’m nothing near as perfect as ya’ll are…<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/strong>
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

the nicest thing about beating yer head against a brick wall is that it feels so good when you quit (don’t read anything into that I ain’t quiting anything) today I got to spend some time sitting at my desk … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1798","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1798","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1798"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1798\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4283,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1798\/revisions\/4283"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1798"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1798"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wyzwmn9444.live-website.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1798"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}