Mayhem abounds

the thing about puppies
is that they are kinda like children

they whine constantly
to get your attention
but are unable to
really tell you
what it is they want

it’s been my experience
that when small children
are excessively quiet
something is afoot

puppies
are much this same

I awoke early today
and as I’d forgotten
to plug in the dishwasher last night
I had to wait for it to run
before I could make coffee

Pixie – as per most mornings
was zippin around here
like the very devil
is on her tail

this is a practice
that takes place
most mornings
for about the first
half hour
after she gets outta the pen

I sit down at the computer
and start my morning
of checking in
FB, BDB, Delphi, AR,
THP, THB, OFOPOS…etc
and the 60 er so blogs
I check daily

I find out that an online friend
of many years
passed away of a massive heart attack
on the 1st of March
and I was so self absorbed
that I’d not noticed.
~R.I.P Squanto – you will be missed~

that makes me sad.

about an hour later I get up
to make coffee
and Pixie comes into the kitchen
with me to get her
morning treat/chewy bone
(thanks Louie…you and Booker
started this one LoL)

so about an half hour later
I’m sipping coffee and still
perusing the www
when it occurs to me
I’ve not heard a peep
outta Pixie
in about 25 min

that can’t be good

I look in all her favorite haunts
behind the toilet in the bathroom
behind the couch
in her crate in the kitchen
under the afghan on the couch
no Pixie

CRAP!
did I leave the door open
do I have to get dressed
and go outside to look for her?

I head to the bedroom
to find my pants
flip on the light
and look at my bed

there’s this huge pile
of white fluff
where my pillow used to live

and the pile of white fluff
has a pair of tiny black ears
peeking out at me

yup
not one
but 2 almost full
boxes of tissue
from my bedside table
are completely shredded
into itty bitty peices
like confetti
and piled lovingly
on my pillow
by one small
black n tan
shredding machine

as I approach the bed
she jumps up
and wiggles at me
as if to say
“Look what I did for you momma
ain’t you proud”

“ya I am sweetheart..
but I’m also gonna have
to wipe my nose
and my weepy peepers
on my nightdress
till I can make it to the store
to buy more tissue”

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well…
if you’ve been watching my Facebook page (and a little bit here) you know a couple of things have happened to me recently

one is that I got a Chihuahua/Pomeranian cross pup…but she’s 100% Chi in looks and attitude…she’s six months old and weighs in at a whopping 2lbs 10oz…I wanted a small dog as I am an apartment dweller and I wanted something I can tuck in my coat to ride with…besides…old single women look less crazy when they are talking to a dog rather than talking to themselves :o)

I had her spayed a week ago – and since then she’s been airborne…I don’t know if it was the drugs they used or wth but this little dog is jet propelled…I got her at 4 months – and she was kinda a rescue…sadly the people that bred her had never once let her out of the house or the breeding pen…so potty training has been a challenge (Chi’s are smart dogs – but they are also as stubborn as the day is long) She’s been really good about using the potty pads when I’m not home but last night I discovered that she’s also kinda partial to the bathroom mat…and I’d never noticed before cos it’s black…ick.

the second thing pertains to being an apartment dweller (and the question at hand)- at the beginning of the month…a meare 9 days ago….someone new moved into the apartment next door to me…with an xbox and a surround sound system – I think he’s 12 but that’s likely got something to do with me being 54…so the more games he plays the louder he gets…the louder he gets the more wound up the little dog gets…the harder the bass the faster she runs the gauntlet from the kitchen to the hall to the living room and back to the kitchen….it’s a vicious circle…

I’m looking for a spell that might suggest to this young man that he’d like to be a little more considerate of his neighbours…one that doesn’t involve shoving his head and the xbox up his ass cos I’m about done….one that won’t (hopefully) land me in jail…cos at this rate there’s gonna come a time when I’m over there at 3 AM wearing nothing but my flannel night gown and my riding boots kickin on his door and physically teaching him some respect….Old School Style…..I’ve tried earplugs but I can still hear the bass and I’m just a hairs breath away from being outta patience…

I can see it now…newspaper headlines “fat bald pagan biker broad in flannel nightgown decimates small young yuppie putz over xbox noise causing hemorrhoid operation in process. “

My ohm is sorta bent – but not quite broken yet…
I just need some freakin quiet
and I gotta quit saying…”what else can go wrong”
*sigh*

I’m off to the eye dr place this morning…
wish me luck!

Wyz

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